At what point does a client need to detach from their therapist?
Attachment is usually a positive thing, and even some temporary feelings of dependency can be OK if they’re addressed in the therapy and don’t lead to any dysfunction.
How is attachment to my therapist a sign of healing when it hurts more than my original pain?
Ah, the pain thing. Therapy can be painful and often is. You’re letting go of some of the maladaptive defenses, and the avoiding, and the self-kidding that cushioned you from pain but stopped your growth. That hurts.